​Grab a tissue…This will be worth the (quick) read. Promise.

The 16th of this month is National Healthcare Decision Day. It’s actually a week – filled with ideas and resources as part of The Conversation Project’s initiative to “provide clear, concise, and consistent information on healthcare decision-making to both the public and providers/facilities.”

Their mission is to “inspire, educate and empower the public and providers about the importance of advance care planning. NHDD is an initiative to encourage patients to express their wishes regarding healthcare and for providers and facilities to respect those wishes, whatever they may be.”

If you are injured or ill and unable to make your own health care decisions, someone else must step in to speak for you.

Having an Advance Care Plan in place is one of the greatest gifts we can give our loved ones.

What that means is…

1) naming someone to make health care decisions for you,

2) knowing what you want and don’t want regarding your care and

3) talking with the person you named (and loved ones) about your wishes.

What happens if you haven’t done this??

Let’s use ME as an example.

What if tomorrow I’m involved in an accident and put on life support. (Morbid, I know but stay with me.)

Our daughters are seven. Twin girls named Gigi and Ryan.

If I haven’t named a health care power of attorney (someone to make medical decisions for me if I am unable), I would hope my spouse will be authorized to make decisions for me. We now reside in California where they look to the “closest available relative.” (Note, that in some cases a spouse may not be whom you’d want to make these decisions– just sayin’.)

So, Jason now is charged with making decisions on my behalf. Remember, our daughters are SEVEN. They’ll see me in this state and likely not want me to “go.” I can only imagine he’ll feel immense guilt and desperation trying to decide what to do – keep me “plugged in” so our daughters still have a mom or, let me go. He’d try to assume what I would want and hope beyond hope he’s doing the “right” thing.

Yuck.

Now picture the same scenario and I’ve named Jason as my health care power of attorney AND I’ve also told him what I want and don’t want if I’m in an incapacitated state and can’t make decisions for myself.

Granted, he’ll still have to make a hard decision.

BUT, he can have the peace and relief knowing he’s following my wishes. No doubt.

Side note: In the first scenario, what if he wanted to “unplug” me, but a family member contested it? Sadly, we’ve seen that scenario played out on television.

That’s a mess. A dirty, nasty, painful mess.

I want to give the gift of peace to Jason. To Gigi and Ryan. To my family and friends.

You can’t put a price on this gift.

I encourage you this month to think about whom you’d like to speak on your behalf. Who can ‘handle’ your wishes? I encourage you to think about what you would want and not want. Your wishes.

To help you, I’ve attached the Missing Pieces Plan Advance Health Care Directive Worksheet as a guide – to help get you thinking.

Then, join the movement the NEXT week on April 16th!

You got this.

I am with you,

Jody

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Now is the time!

The holidays are here! Over the next days and weeks we’ll be gathering with family and friends.

Now is the time.

The time to share your wishes.

The time to ask a loved one their wishes.

The time to share your stories.

The time to ask a loved one about their stories.

The time to tell a loved one one wish.

The time to ask a loved one one wish.

 

WHAT?!? That’s morbid. I’m not going to talk about this stuff.

But, I ask, why wait? Why not NOW?

You won’t know what a gift it is, until it’s late.

Give the gift of peace to your loved ones.

You ask, “But how?”

Here are a couple of conversation starters…

  1. I’ve been reading this book, Missing Pieces Plan and the author stresses the importance of getting our “affairs in order” to leave a legacy, not a mess. And, to communicate my “wishes” to give peace of mind. I want to give you that gift so, here are a few of mine…
  2. Hey, I’ve been thinking about what I want when I die. Can I share it with you?
  3. Taking the burden off of you for planning my funeral is important to me. I want you to know my wishes.
  4. I don’t want to leave things a mess for you when I am gone. I want you to know where my important documents are…
  5. I’m putting pieces together for my end of life plan – is there anything you would like to know? Are there heirlooms that are important to you?

The magnitude of sharing just one wish for your end of life plan is far reaching.

We won’t be here to experience this gift we’ve given our loved ones. But, we can delight in giving them the gift now. We can settle into the feeling of peace of mind. We can feel the comfort we will be giving – even when our physical bodies are no longer here.

Now is the time.

Share just one wish, one stories, one want. Start the conversation. It’ll be a priceless gift.

Sending love and blessings for the happiest of holidays!

Jody